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The way of love is more important than love itself

Release time:

2020-07-22

The way of love is more important than love itself

Stay at home during the Spring Festival. I watched "Lost Mom" carefully. Many plots made me feel familiar. It triggered my further thinking about the relationship between mother and child (female). The mother of Xu Yiwan, the protagonist in

, has a strong desire for control. She seems to control everything about her children. Only then does she feel that she is doing her duty as a mother. She felt that she loved her children warmly, but she never thought about whether what she wanted to give to others was what they liked. There is a widely circulated joke on the Internet, "There is a kind of cold that makes your mother think you are cold", which is about this kind of maternal love: when autumn comes, children don't feel cold because they are young and in good health, but mothers don't think from the perspective of children, because they feel cold and have to wear long johns, so they force their children to wear long johns too. She thinks it's all for the kids. This has caused the child's disgust and resistance, because such "love" is not what the child needs.

The ways and means of love are more important than love itself.

Almost everyone will be controlled by their parents when they grow up, but some control and discipline based on their parents' own ideas will not make the child better, but suppress the child's talent and creativity. In particular, some parents still "listen to politics" and give orders in the name of love after their children have grown up or even got married, causing a series of family conflicts and problems, and even the breakdown of their children's marriage. In the film, Xu Yiwan, faced with too much interference and control of his mother, finally couldn't bear to say what he had been holding in his heart for many years: "In your eyes (I), everything is a problem, my marriage is a problem, my body is a problem, whether I answer the phone or not, whether I have children is a problem..." The mother was shocked. It turned out that the well-behaved son suddenly disappeared, and she accused and roared at herself, so she quietly left her son with a wounded heart. Xu Yiwan had to look for and catch up with his mother all the way. After a close escape, the mother and son could finally open their hearts calmly. With a deep communication, the heart knot over the years was finally opened.

Therefore, whether we love our children or when we love our loved ones, we must pay attention to the ways and means and think about whether the ways and means of expressing our love are appropriate and appropriate for the other party. Remember, no matter how sincere love and care are, if they are excessive, they will also cause harm to others. (Shenyang)

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